


Holding On To You

by leonardodafic



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Ace Tyler, Asexual Character, Established Relationship, Jordie is only here via phone, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2019-07-22
Packaged: 2020-07-10 11:04:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19904695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leonardodafic/pseuds/leonardodafic
Summary: Tyler really doesn't want this time to end up like every other time





	Holding On To You

**Author's Note:**

> Shoutout to all my ace people out there, this one is for y'all  
> Side Note: everyone is different and has their own preferences but this is based loosely on my experiences so enjoy  
> PS: the title came from the tøp song but it has nothing to do with the song at all

Tyler really didn’t know what to expect when he got traded to Dallas. I mean he was in Boston, an original six hockey city. However, when he finally got to Dallas, he was pleasantly surprised.  
He and Jamie became friends right away and the rest of the team seemed to like him just fine and seemed to be glad he was there. Tyler didn’t know if that was a blessing or a curse.  
Yeah, he was happy to be on a team that wanted him but for how long? He didn’t want to get too attached to another team if it was just going to be like Boston all over again. So, he decided before he could get too attached he would lay it all on the table. No secrets that could get him traded.  
That’s why a week after he met the entire team he told them everything. Before everyone went out for practice, he stood on his locker and got everyone’s attention. He told them about what happened in Boston and the reason he actually got traded and hey surprise he’s bi.  
That last part he had to hold his breath while saying. He was anticipating the same reaction he got from his old teammates. That’s not what he got. Most of them didn’t even bat an eye. It surprised him at first but then again not everyone treats situations the same. It also helped that Jamie apparently was also bi and out to the team.  
Dallas was going to be a good home for him. He didn’t want to screw anything up with this team. He loved his new teammates and they loved him. And that’s why he didn’t make a move on Jamie for a really long time. Like years long even when the rest of the team egged them on.   
Everyone knew there was something else there between them besides just being best friends. Hell, even Tyler and Jamie knew but neither of them ever did anything about it except for flirt a lot.  
Tyler knew his reasons for not doing anything but he didn’t know Jamie’s. He imagined it was because he was the captain and didn’t want to complicate things but that was just him guessing.   
I guess you could call it a stroke of luck that got them together. Or maybe it was just the rest of the team trying to be matchmakers. Either way it worked and they were on a date.  
They didn’t consider it a date at first. They called it two buddies hanging out until well they didn’t. They eventually caved and stopped denying their feelings for each other which the rest of the team were really happy about. So happy, they played Hallelujah by Panic! At The Disco when the two walked into the locker room the next day. You could say the team was not surprised in the slightest when Tyler and Jamie told them that they were officially a couple.  
Two Weeks Later  
One day Tyler was over at Jamie’s watching tv when they started wrestling over the remote. Tyler successfully pinned Jamie to the ground. Whether Jamie let him win or if he won fair and square Tyler will never know. Their faces were inches away from each other and all Tyler had to do was lean down to close the gap between them. Instead he cleared his throat and lifted himself off the ground and back to the couch.  
A Week Later  
They were walking Tyler’s dogs together and holding hands. It was a nice day and the sun was starting to set. You could say it was pretty romantic. When they finally got to the dog park, they sat on a bench together.   
Tyler was laughing at something the dogs were doing but Jamie was watching Tyler. Jamie really wanted to kiss him but he wasn’t sure if Tyler would appreciate that in public. He decided he would let Tyler decide. I mean he was making it pretty obvious that he wanted to kiss him but Tyler would have to lean in before he did anything. When Jamie finally got out of his head he realized Tyler was looking back at him now. A smile was on his face and he actually did lean in. At the last second though he turned his head and put it on Jamie’s shoulder with a sigh. Okay so was it Jamie? Did Tyler not like him anymore?  
He even asked Jordie for advice that night.  
“Look I don’t know what’s going on. I mean I’ve made it pretty clear that I want to kiss him but he just doesn’t?” Jamie sort of asked.  
“Y’all have been dating for three weeks maybe he’s just not ready? Maybe he wants to take it slow,” Jordie offered.   
“This is Tyler Seguin we are talking about. You’ve heard the stories.”   
“Maybe that’s just it.”   
“What do you mean?”  
“Maybe they’re just stories.”   
“Jordie we’ve both seen him take people home.”   
“No. We’ve seen him leave with people but he never talks about it afterwards.”  
“I don’t know.”   
“Look if this is bothering you so much why don’t you just ask him?”  
“I- yeah I guess I can.”   
“Try not to be awkward about it.”  
“Bye Jordie,” Jamie hung up the phone.  
Jamie took what Jordie said into consideration. He gave Tyler a little more time. Maybe he did want to take it slow and Jamie was fine with that.   
After a month of them dating Jamie was starting to worry though. It’s not that he wasn’t ready that worried Jamie. It was that Tyler didn’t even seem like he wanted to kiss him. Jamie had to know so he finally mustered up the courage to ask him.  
“Hey Tyler can I asked you something?” Jamie was hesitant.  
“Yeah what’s up?” Tyler said looking over at him with ease.  
“So, we’ve been dating for a month now...” Jamie pauses trying to find the right words.  
“But?” Tyler asked but Jamie could tell he was tense now.  
“We haven’t ya know kissed?” It came across more as a question.  
“Oh,” Tyler was still tensed up but he did relax a little.  
“Oh?” Jamie asked.  
“I didn’t know you wanted to,” Tyler shrugged like he had never thought about it.  
“You didn’t know? I thought I made it pretty clear,” Jamie said.  
“I don’t know. It never really crossed my mind,” Tyler said.  
“Oh,” Jamie was kind of offended by that.  
“Uhh not that I was intentionally trying not to kiss you. I didn’t mean it like that. I do want to it’s just I didn’t think about it,” Tyler fumbled through the words.  
“Wait Ty you have kissed someone before, right?” Jamie asked uncertain.  
“Yeah of course. That’s not what- look I really like you and I don’t want to mess this up,” Tyler said unsure this time.  
“I really like you too. I was just worried that you know you didn’t want to be with me anymore,” Jamie said.  
“Hey no of course I want to be with you okay?” Tyler placed a hand on top of Jamie’s.  
“Okay,” Jamie smiled and leaned back into the couch. They were fine. This was good.  
Two weeks later and they still hadn’t kissed. Jamie couldn’t put this one on Tyler though. It was a busy two weeks with traveling and games and it had never been the right moment.  
When they finally did get some free time, they went on a date. Afterwards Jamie dropped Tyler back off at his house. Jamie walked Tyler to the door like a gentleman. Tyler turned to look at him with a smile. He said goodnight and was about to close the door when Jamie stopped him. Jamie got close and kissed him. Tyler kissed back for a few seconds and then pulled away. Okay so it wasn’t exactly what Jamie was hoping for but he could deal with that.  
Tyler closed the door and touched his lips. That wasn’t so bad right? I mean he wanted to kiss Jamie. It’s just after a few seconds, all his instincts told him to pull away. He really liked Jamie though and didn’t want him to think that he didn’t. So, he grabbed his phone and called Brownie.  
“Hey bud how’d the date go?” Brownie asked as soon as he answered.  
“Good. Yeah it went well,” Tyler said.  
“What happened?”  
“Nothing bad. We kissed.”  
“Okay y’all kissed. But what exactly happened?”  
“Nothing really. I kissed him back and then pulled away after a few seconds and closed the door in his face.”  
“Tyler!”  
“I didn’t know what to do!”  
“Not slam the door in his face.”  
“I didn’t slam it. I shut it quickly.”  
“Have you thought about telling him?”  
“Yeah and I will... eventually.”   
“Ty, I don’t want you getting hurt if..”  
“I know but I really like him and I don’t want this to end yet.”  
“Look Tyler I’m not going to tell you how to live but we both know what happened last time.”  
“Yeah I know. I’m going to tell him soon but for now I’m going to bed.”   
They hung up and he went up to his room and passed out on the bed.  
The next time they hung out it was just chilling at Tyler’s house with some of their other teammates. Tyler was much more observant now and he knew Jamie wanted to kiss him but Tyler dodged it and tried to avoid him for the rest of the time. When the others left Jamie cornered him.  
“Hey is something wrong?” Jamie asked.  
“What do you mean?” Tyler asked.  
“I know you’re not good with the whole taking hints thing but I was trying to kiss you earlier.”  
“I- yeah I know.”  
“Umm okay..”  
“No not like that. I just don’t like public affection.”  
“Oh. Why didn’t you tell me that?”  
“It’s never came up I guess.”  
“So, you won’t mind if I kiss you right now then?” Jamie stepped closer again.  
“I don’t think that will be a problem,” Tyler said and he did mean it at least for a few seconds.  
Jamie leaned in and kissed him and Tyler was okay with this for like five seconds this time. He pulled back and tried to give Jamie a smile. God Tyler what is wrong with you. Jamie gave him a confused look at first but it must have worked because Jamie smiled back and took his hand and dragged him back to the couch to watch a movie.   
So, it didn’t work as much as Tyler thought. Jamie was suspicious, not that he let Tyler know that. He did however let Jordie know.  
“How’s it going with Tyler?” Jordie asked when he could tell Jamie was distracted.  
“Good I think,” Jamie said.  
“You think?”  
“Well he lets me kiss him but I don’t know he always pulls away after a few seconds like he doesn’t want to.”  
“But he does kiss you back right?”  
“Yeah but I don’t know.”  
“Maybe you’re just a bad kisser.”  
“You’re not helping,” Jamie said and hung up.  
A Few Days Go By  
Okay so maybe Tyler was just nervous about taking it to the next level? That’s why he always pulled away when they kissed for too long. Maybe he was just nervous about having sex for the first time. Jamie figured he should just rip off the bandage. I mean Jamie was nervous about them having sex too but if they just got it over with everything could be normal.   
He invited Tyler over for date night. Jamie decided to cook for them which turned out to be extremely difficult when he was sweating so bad. After dinner, they went to the couch and cuddled together. Tyler was looking at Jamie with concern in his eyes.  
“Hey you okay?” Tyler asked.  
“Yeah I’m fine why?” Jamie asked.  
“You just had a weird look on your face.”  
“I did not.”  
“No, you definitely did.”  
“You gonna proof it?”  
“You’re such a dork.” Tyler was smiling up at him now.   
It seemed like there was nobody else in the world except for the two of them. Now was the perfect chance for Jamie to try this. He leaned down and kissed Tyler for a second put pulled back to look at him. Tyler didn’t seem nervous anymore so he leaned in again and kissed him longer. Tyler didn’t pull away like he normally did which made him think he wanted this too. After a while Jamie grabbed the bottom of Tyler’s shirt and started to lift.  
Tyler froze which made Jamie freeze as well. He stopped kissing him and looked at Tyler’s face. Tyler looked like he wanted to throw up which what the fuck?   
“Is everything okay?” Jamie finally asked.  
“Uh yeah I just remembered I have to um go feed the boys. I’ll see you tomorrow at practice,” Tyler practically jumped off the couch.  
“Ty wait!” Jamie said getting his wits about him and finally getting off the couch himself. He was too late though, Tyler was out of the door and in his car. Seriously what the fuck?  
A Few Weeks Later   
Jamie hadn’t tried to kiss Tyler anymore and well Tyler obviously hadn’t tried to kiss Jamie. Tyler found that weird though. I mean Tyler was fine with this but Jamie? A normal guy that does like kissing? And he’s not trying to kiss Tyler? Something was up and Tyler knew Jamie was starting to doubt them. He knew he had to tell him his secret. He went over to Jamie’s house unexpectedly one night and sat down on his couch.  
“Hey so I need to talk to you,” Tyler said quietly.  
“Um okay yeah what’s up?” Jamie looked nervous.  
“So okay we’ve been dating for a while now and it’s been good right?”  
“Ty are you breaking up with me?”  
“What? No! Why would you think that?”  
“I just I don’t know okay? I thought everything was going well and then you freaked out and left that night.”  
“Yeah about that I’m sorry that was dumb of me.”  
“If you weren’t ready to have sex you should’ve just said that.”  
“It’s not that simple.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“When I tell people this, they usually run.”  
“Tyler whatever it is we can work through it.”  
“That’s just the thing, we can’t. You either have to accept it or you don’t.”  
“Can you please tell me now?”  
“Okay yeah right so um I’m uh I’m asexual.”  
Jamie didn’t say anything. He just stared at him with a confused look so Tyler tried again.  
“Asexual. As in I don’t want sex.”  
“With me?”  
“No or I mean yes well with anyone. I don’t want sex with anyone.”  
“Okay.”  
“I don’t think you understand what I’m saying.”  
“Wait is that why you always pull away when I kiss you?”  
“Yeah. I mean I want to kiss you but then when I’m actually doing it I just have to pull away. I don’t know if this is making any sense to you right now and I’m sorry but it’s hard to explain.”  
“I thought you just didn’t like me this whole time,”  
“No Jamie I do like a lot. I was scared to tell you because of that. And look I understand if you don’t want to do this anymore. I mean I get it you want sex it’s natural to you. So, if you don’t want to do this I need you to tell me. No hard feelings.”  
“I’m not breaking up with you.”  
“Wait what? You don’t understand I-”  
“Ty I’m not with you for sex.”  
“Yeah but you’ll want sex eventually and I don’t think I can ever give that to you.”  
“Tyler listen to me. I love you. I’m not going to let something like you not wanting sex change that.”  
“But are you sure?”   
“Yeah. Positive.”  
“Okay but you have to promise me that you’ll tell me if you can’t to do this anymore.”  
“I promise but I don’t think that’ll ever happen.”  
“You say that now.”  
“I mean it. I might not fully understand what this all means but you can tell me right?”  
“Anything you want to know you can ask.”  
“We’re good though right?”  
“Yeah we’re good,” Tyler was so out of his element. This has never happened to him before. He looked at Jamie who was smiling at him now. How did he get so lucky?  
“Wait did you say you love me?” Tyler blurted out.  
“I did,” Jamie chuckled and pulled him in for a hug.  
“I love you too,” Tyler hugged him back.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this all at work. I'm honestly a trash employee but I've been on writers block for so long and this just came to me so whatever


End file.
